Friday, August 28, 2009

One of the Hardest Things

Last night while laying in bed Kieran asked me who my Mom is. I told him her name is Rebecca and that she is his Grandma. Then he asked me where she is, said he wanted to go see her and wanted her to come to our house. He's 3 so it was hard trying to explain why we couldn't do those things. I explained to the best of my ability that she isn't here anymore, that she had to go far far away and we can't see her. He kept asking questions so I told him that she died and it's sad...that it means we can't see her. He started getting upset and yelling saying she didn't die and we CAN go see her. Every time he said that I felt my heart break. He doesn't know what death is so he was just frustrated and over tired, but he does know what a Grandma is. He knows other people have Grandma's, knows all about Grandparents from watching Caillou(lol) and knows about Grandma Weber(who is his Great Grandma), but the poor boy doesn't have a Grandma and wants one.
He'll often ask about HIS Grandma while seeing or hearing about someone else's.
It saddens me most that he never met her, and she never even knew he would exist. I wish they could have at least known each other. Same for Chloe. Life can be so unfair. I'm glad Nevin knew her for as long as he did and has memories.

6 comments:

Michelle R said...

we should talk about this sometime....I've had similar conversations with my kids. it's SO hard!

Shannon Ryan said...

:( So sad..

BePe Baby said...

Big hugs to mommy!

Kristina said...

Oh my. :( Kailey is somehow spiritually connected with Jesse's grandmother who passed away then she was 5 weeks old. She is always asking about her and how she died, etc, we don't talk about great grandma much, but Kailey is ALWAYS talking about her, like she knew her. What we've learn that helps Kailey, is talk about what she liked to do for fun, keep pictures around, and stuff like that. This has helped us from an early age with her. But the difference, this was great grandma and not grandma. But maybe this will some how help Kieran.

Sorry for typos or not making sense. lol

Deva Gibson said...

I'm sorry honey :( :HUGS:

Sarah said...

I'm so sorry Melissa! We've been dealing with having to explain death to Lily since her grandpa just died. It's so hard and at 3 or 4 there is just no way to help them to understand it. HUGS!